Myths and Lies

The purpose of this section is to expose the common misconceptions that parents have about the Internet, pornography, and their kids. When parents have a clear understanding of the truth it makes it much easier to set boundaries, parent smart, and relate to their kids. Unfortunately, there are many myths out there. Parents for the most part are not technology friendly and kids are! They know all the tricks. Parents must never underestimate the power and influence of their kids’ peers. This section is dedicated to helping parents see what the actual truth is and when they are at some point confronted they can respond with correct information. Also, many of the myths here are what you may believe about the problem of porn.

Myspace is just for my friends.
In all actuality it is more common for people to be on MySpace to interact with people outside of their friends. With the unlimited capabilities of the Internet, it makes more sense to interact with people that children don’t see everyday than to intermingle with those they just saw at school.

I look at porn myself. I’ll be a hypocrite if I tell my kids not to.
Yes, you are sort of a hypocrite. But that doesn’t excuse you from addressing this issue with your kids. It doesn’t get you off the hook. Maybe it makes you a little more aware of the issues at hand and the critical importance of talking about porn. Share from your story and personal experience if you think it might help warn your kids.

Mom, relax. Only my friends see my MySpace page.
No. Everyone sees everybody’s page. Everybody’s site is equally accessible to anyone on the Web. There is no barrier or filter that stops online predators, or anyone else from seeing a MySpace page.

Porn exposure isn’t that big of a deal
Minimize and justify it all you want. This is a big deal. Make sure to check out the section of how porn impacts kids. You’ll change your mind.

I only go to safe places and school chat rooms when I am online.
There are thousands of chat rooms online that allow anybody in. There is no way for a chat room to be filtered from people outside of the intended audience. If a student can get into a chat room, so can anyone.

My porn stash is safely hidden. They won’t find it.
For the sake of your kids get the porn out of your house. A majority of teens have shared with us that their first exposure to porn was from their parents’ stash. And usually this happens at a very young age. Get rid of the DVD’s, the downloads, and the magazines. Kids’ curiosity can be intense and you would be surprised what they get into.

My child isn’t old enough for me to talk to them about porn.
Would it surprise you that the average age at which a child is exposed to pornography is eleven? That’s the average which means a significant amount of kids younger than eleven are exposed on a daily basis. And the scary thing is that the research is showing that the average of porn exposure is getting younger. It is hard to imagine but true. Or take this for example: Ninety percent of kids eight to sixteen years old have viewed porn online, mostly accidentally while doing homework. (NOP Research Group)

My PSP is only for video games and nothing else.
The Playstation Portable (PSP) is a gaming device that allows users to connect to the Internet through a wireless Internet connection. When connected to the Internet it is possible for a child to download anything onto their PSP including music, video, and picture files. This translates to ample access to pornography and any other undesirable downloadable content for any PSP wielding child out there. The PSP can even play movies from its specialized video format, the UMD. The UMD is much like the DVD or VHS, but is used for the PSP console.

I’ve Got One Shot to Get This Porn Talk Right
Now that’s a lot of pressure you’re putting on yourself and it is a bit misguided. You might be surprised to know how merciful and compassionate your kids will be. You will get a lot more props in their book if you at least try and talk to them about it rather than just ignore it and live in complete denial and fear.

I can’t see porn on the computer. You need money or a credit card to do that kind of stuff.
Pornography can be as simple as plugging keywords into a search engine. There are little to no filters on search engines to prevent such images or sites popping up on an engine. Pornography is a downloadable content that can be found in every form of media and downloaded onto anything from a computer to a PSP without a credit card or any age verification system. In fact almost seventy-five percent of adult Websites offer free teaser porn on their homepages.

If I Bring Up the Issue of Porn It Will Only Make Them More Curious
That kind of makes sense but it’s not really correct. You as the parent who initiates the conversation have the opportunity to address the issue of porn in a healthy and positive way. You’re able to talk about it in terms that won’t entice, but warn. When conversations are based on truth and concern for the well being of your child, this is an incredibly positive context. You have the opportunity to instill the values, guidelines, and expectations in your child. This does not create sinister curiosity but a healthy view and understanding.

Porn Is Just Naked Girls With Big Boobs
No. Not really. In today’s world we are living with the most extreme content. The internet has allowed anyone to get anything they want at anytime. The content is shocking even to the most worldly of souls. This is not the years of Playboy and Larry Flynt. It’s about hard core porn and images that would really surprise you. From violence, choking, gang bangs, rape videos, content depicting urination and defecation, and extremely dangerous and unhealthy acts. This is the world of the internet. This is the world of porn.

MySpace is protected from false information, online predators, and objectionable images.
While MySpace claims there is ample protection from any false information and offensive images on the MySpace server, there is none. There is no age verification system as well as no way to ensure that the images and information on the server are an accurate representation of the person controlling their personal site. MySpace is a prime example of uncontrolled community that anyone can gain access to.

Only messed up kids get involved with pornography.
In actuality this is a myth. Ordinary, everyday kids are exposed to pornography and easily at a young age can develop an appetite for pornography. Every child is vulnerable and every child is being targeted, never underestimate the power of peer pressure.

Porn Is A Guy’s Thing. I’ve Got All Daughters.
Porn is a topic that impacts both sexes. It’s not just a guy’s thing anymore. With over 30% of porn last year purchased by women, it is becoming a bigger and bigger issue with the female gender. Young girls are just as curious about sexuality and can be exposed to porn just like boys can. Also many girls are endangering themselves online with inappropriate and dangerous relationships. Don’t dismiss this issue just because you have all daughters.